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So Coca Cola had crazy caps to make the empty bottles useful
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-So... after sex, you're going to rip my head off and eat it? And you just talk to me about it?
-Yes, it sounds stupid, but if I don't warn you in writing, it will be considered a violation of the law... and please be quiet... we're in a public place
-You know, I'm not running away from here now just because I'm so shocked that I even wonder what you can offer me.
-well... I'll let you yell "Walhalla!" while you're fucking me... what?.. my girlfriend told me that many of you like it
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Today I witnessed my friend breaking up with his (obese) girlfriend.
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I can't grow a beard, so my girlfriend gave me this!
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Huge argument with my girlfriend. This is my plan to make her talk to me again.
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Girlfriend walked outside this morning to see this, a bunch of snails in a circle with leader in the middle.
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My neighbor kicked his girlfriend out last week. This happened this weekend.
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When my bestfriend's girlfriend breaks up with him and says it's because he's "too nice".
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To people like my brother's vegan girlfriend who always ruin Thanksgiving dinner
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